Adult kids staying at home is alarmingly on the rise.Just last night I was talking to a woman who was telling me about her 55 year old brother who still is not working and is living at home.It hurts to do that but you have to love her enough to be willing to endure that hurt unselfishly so she can learn to take care of herself.

She basically lives on her child support and her dad and I have to help pay her bills as we are on one of her loans as co-signers.

How do we get her on the right track and help her start being responsible short of kicking her and our grandchild out of the house and turning our backs on her?

This is more common than you think, but that doesn’t make it right. When your daughter was young, you undoubtedly had to say no to her at times about something because you knew it was for her own good.

In the same way, you may have to do some uncomfortable things for her own good now.

My husband and I have always been good stewards of our money.

Somehow, we raised a daughter that is not and it breaks my heart.Grandbabies do complicate things and you will have to use your own judgement when reflecting on the things I will suggest. Often, the only thing that will motivate someone when adult children won’t leave home is for them to be to make it on their own.Until they have the rug pulled out from under them, they will not change. They know you will bail them out so, if it’s a little difficult to do something else, why should they bother to help themselves?Second, you are not alone wondering what to do when adult children won’t leave home.This is probably one of the top 5 questions I get asked.You might want to start at step 1 or, if it is bad enough, you might have to start at step 3.